Possibly you have already had to deal with envious people who have passed through your life and know how difficult this task can be. The feeling of envy, basically, is the the desire to possess something that belongs to another The envious person feels displeasure because of the happiness of the other.

That said, of course the denotation sounds extremely negative, but did you know that envious people may not generate anything bad in your life. But that will depend on how you interpreted the envious person, whether or not they are harming your life and how you handled the situation.

In short, envy is a desire to possess something that belongs to another. Beforehand, know that even though it may seem like something extremely negative, depending on how you deal with envious people, it can be good for your personal progress.

Therefore, to better explain this, in this article we will bring you tips to identify envious people and how to deal with them in a way that is constructive for your life.

Table of Contents

• What does envy mean?
• Characteristics of envious people
  • 10 tips on how to identify a jealous person
• How to deal with envy? 10 days how to deal with envious people
  • 1. help the envious person
  • See the envious person as a tool for your progress
  • 3. seek dialogue and offer alternatives
  • 4. impose yourself and set limits
  • 5. question what bothers the person so much
  • 6. decrease negative interactions
  • 7. don't take it personally
  • 8. ignore negative comments
  • 9. keep your state of life high
  • 10. don't get into unnecessary confrontations

What does envy mean?

The word envy means a feeling of disgust caused by the well-being, prosperity or happiness of another, or the great desire to possess or enjoy what belongs to another. Without a doubt, it is a bad feeling, of total unhappiness, motivated by the happiness of another.

If we start seeing envy not only in its literal sense, it is possible to verify that envious people can use this feeling as a motivational factor. inspiration on how to achieve a certain result of life.

Characteristics of envious people

As we said, not all envy should be seen as negative, because many times we feel envious, but we don't wish the other person harm, only that we intend to reach that same level.

However, harmful envy happens when the envious person starts having attitudes to destroy the other person's achievement, which has aroused his or her envy. Therefore, to be able to easily identify these envious people, we have separated examples of their main characteristics:

10 tips on how to identify a jealous person

1. creates situations to boycott the progress of the other;
2. makes slanders and persecutions;
3. The envious person has self-destructive and even death thoughts;
4. at work, for example, gossips to sabotage his work;
5. does not care how you are feeling, but what you have and she does not;
6. are self-centered people;
7. with low self-esteem;
8. puts the blame on the other about his own resentments;
9. always wishes evil for the other;
10. They try to make you feel bad in public.

Faced with these situations, when trying to deal with envious people, we tend to have conflict as an immediate reaction, as a way to protect our achievements. It can even happen that the person starts to have the same attitudes as the envious person, such as, for example, making up gossip to harm him or her.

This is the worst thing to do, because ends up generating a vicious cycle of unhappiness So you must have the wisdom to deal with envious people who come into your life.

How to deal with envy? 10 days how to deal with envious people

Instead of getting into unnecessary conflicts that will only hurt you, especially emotionally, learn to deal with envious people using wise and positive approaches.

1. help the envious person

If the person is envious of you, in some way he admires you, even if it is in a strange and apparently mean way. The envious person may even be causing intrigues to harm you, deep down he has such attitudes because he wants to be a bit of you, of your happiness.

If someone is jealous of you, it may be a sign that you are making progress, and you yourself are not seeing it.

Therefore, a good strategy for dealing with envious people is to approach her and become an ally In other words, approach them in an open way and try to understand what they want, and then give it to them. Keep the focus on what they want to achieve in life, and try to help them by showing them the way.

But beware of one important detail, even if you are trying to help, only give advice when asked for it. Try to approach the person and if, only if, they ask you questions, share your experience and the step by step of achieving your conquests, the ones that are being envied.

I want information to enroll in the Psychoanalysis Course .

See the envious person as a tool for your progress

Unfortunately there are bad people, who use envy to nurture negative thoughts, and in no way want help. These people are more interested in intrigue than in their own happiness. In this case, when it becomes impossible to help envious people who are at this point, you need to reformulate the situation.

When you are achieving good results in your life, it is inevitable that envious people will appear. So, if you are not prepared to deal with these people, maybe you are not prepared to deal with your own success. Therefore, don't bother with the envious and focus on your purposes.

3. seek dialogue and offer alternatives

Depending on the circumstance, an agreement can be the best way out. So, call the person to talk and, if possible, offer him/her alternatives. Show him/her that we don't always have everything we want, but that there are other options in life, which can also lead us to happiness.

So be creative and come up with good alternatives to present to the person in such a way that your envy ceases or diminishes. Try to show them a number of possibilities so that they can choose one.

4. impose yourself and set limits

When the other person's jealousy is going beyond mere comments, and is starting to harm your routine, it is time to have a direct communication and set limits to that situation. Many jealous people want, out of sheer spite, only for you to fail, and they start behaving to this end.

In this sense, an alternative is to call the person for a frank conversation, exposing, in an assertive way, what is happening and that it needs to stop.

If you feel that this will have no practical effect, call a third party to the conversation, who will serve as a mediator For example, if the person is spreading lies about your work, call your supervisor to join the conversation.

5. question what bothers the person so much

This is one of the strategies for dealing peacefully with envious people. In a polite and kind way, question what bothers you so much, the reasons why he gets so upset when he is with you. For example, "Did I do something to upset you?" This will open the door for a healthy dialogue without resentment.

6. decrease negative interactions

As mentioned earlier, there are jealous people who do not want help or to resolve the situation through dialogue. In such cases the best thing to do is to stay away and reduce as much as possible the interactions that you know will be negative.

Many times the envious one ends up even helping you, because you walk away and end up going towards a place that will benefit your life, without wasting more of your energy. So use the envious one reflexively, about what is really best for your life.

7. don't take it personally

Understand that envious people So, instead of wasting your energy on this envy, look at it from another angle. If you are causing envy, it is a sign that you are making progress.

8. ignore negative comments

To help you ignore the negative comments, it is appropriate to describe an old tale:

I want information to enroll in the Psychoanalysis Course .

A Samurai asks his disciples, "If someone comes to you with a gift, and you don't accept it, to whom does the gift belong?"

One of the disciples replies, "In that case, the gift belongs to the one who tried to deliver it.

Then Samura concludes, "The same goes for envy, anger, and insults. When you don't accept them, they continue to belong to the one who carried them.

So if envious people say negative things, ignore them and let them carry the envy alone. If they don't want your help, continue on your way to your happiness without paying attention to negative comments.

9. keep your state of life high

Never let your state of life sink to the level of envious people. That is, even if the person is negative, continue with your positivity, somehow seeking the best ways to deal with life situations.

But it is important to remember that having empathy does not mean that you are a goody-goody person. Having empathy can help you solve problems, because you will be able to identify and act when you are facing a jealous person who simply, out of spite, wishes you to fail.

10. don't get into unnecessary confrontations

Even if none of these tips work, don't make the mistake of getting into a confrontation with envious people. The result of this will always be negative, you will be demeaning yourself and have the same attitudes as the envious person.

If you fight with the same weapons as the envious one, you are repaying the bad behavior, which in practice is bringing more conflict, unhappiness and suffering, for both of you.

Therefore, envious people will only get to you if you don't have the wisdom to deal with the situation. Unfortunately interpersonal relationships may not be difficult and we can't try to change people who don't want help. So it's up to you alone to choose the path of tranquility or conflict.

Finally, if you have come this far, you possibly like to understand how the human mind works. So, we invite you to get to know our Training Course in Clinical Psychoanalysis, 100% distance learning. Among the main benefits is the Improvement in interpersonal relationships: understanding how the mind works can provide a better relationship with family and work members. The course is atool that helps the student to understand other people's thoughts, feelings, emotions, pains, desires and motivations.