For many, the idea of putting oneself in the other's shoes comes up against individual experiences. However latent the need to sensitize, someone may find it difficult to connect with the other person, thus failing to understand their value. Understand better why you should put yourself in the other's place .

No Assumptions

A very common mistake when talking about putting yourself in the other person's shoes is the assumption Thanks to a certain lack of sensitivity, we decide to speculate about what happens instead of finding out for sure.

Assumption here takes a form of those who don't want to or know how to get involved. This is because it is more "safe", so to speak. You can make a list of what might be going on, but without getting directly involved. In general, this ends up distancing the parties in a time of great need.

In order to avoid this, always show courage and ask directly what you want to know. Thanks to this you will get a real, more enlightened and direct answer as to what may be happening to the other person. Furthermore, this shows your interest in the welfare of others. Even if you don't have an answer, this shows a greater awareness.

Empathy: the art of putting yourself in the other person's shoes

Empathy means to be sensitive to someone's situation, to feel what they also feel When it comes to putting yourself in the other's shoes, this tool takes on a fundamental role in this choice. Through it, we can unravel the whole situation experienced by our loved ones, understanding their point of view and their actions.

Once you set out to be more empathetic, you will build the paths that lead you to success in relationships. This is because you learn from others' experiences, sharing yours as well. Without them realizing it at first, this connection allows you to grow together, teaching the value in being humble.

Moreover, the perception of the difficulties that others have makes us reflect on our own. Sometimes we believe we are facing the greatest injustice in the world. We think we are targets of the universal conspiracy that aims to bring us down. When we see the difficulties that others experience, we realize that our difficulties may be smaller.

Why put yourself in the other person's shoes?

For many, putting themselves in the other person's shoes is a waste of energy. Unfortunately, this ends up giving evidence of their conduct, since it shows their insensitivity. Conversation and understanding between people provide the possibility of having a support whenever they need it. In some cases, if not assisted, an individual can lose everything they have.

The idea of putting yourself in the other's shoes is to understand the moment in which he or she is living. You temporarily let go of your own experiences and the paths you have chosen and see them from the other's point of view. There are no demands, unnecessary emissions or complaints, but rather attention, dedication, neutrality and patience .

Once you decide to be more empathetic, you open the doors to respect by understanding their differences. Furthermore, you avoid creating hurt feelings, arguments, and even senseless disputes. To be empathetic is to humanize yourself and the other person, giving them the chance to share their life. Although we see ourselves as a community, we act little like one.

Emotional Control

By putting yourself in the other person's shoes you must also establish a filter to protect yourself. This is because deep involvement can end up negatively affecting the one who was willing to feel Given the lack of adequate resilience, many end up taking the pain and getting hurt by it. In so doing, they plunge into:

Suffering

It is as if your mind opens up space to create a persona that resembles the other. This introjection provides continual and exhausting suffering until everything is resolved.

I want information to enroll in the Psychoanalysis Course .

Read Also: The Difficult Art of Putting Yourself in Another's Position

Excessive worry

As long as the one who has opened up does not resolve his situation, the empath will limit himself to worrying beyond what he should. In his mind, the idea that the problem is not his own does not settle properly. Thus, he enters an anxious state where he looks for ways to help the other out of that moment.

Internal conflicts

As said lines above, it is as if you create a piece of someone's image inside of you. However, this ends up clashing with your true nature. While this created part will worry excessively about someone else, your original form will want to live its own life. The conflict created affects your emotions and actions.

How to be more empathetic?

When you are willing to put yourself in the other person's shoes, you have to be free to change. The ability to look at someone through his eyes depends on a very visible detachment from oneself While it may be difficult, it is possible, by making dedication your greatest ally. Try starting with:

1. avoid judgments

Once the other person starts telling his or her story, just receive it, no more and no less. By this we mean to recommend that you don't make judgments about the moment he or she is living in. Besides preventing judgments, you avoid making bad impressions, even if this is not your initial intention.

2. don't compare your personal experiences

An isolated individual is unique, be it for his or her faults or virtues. This ends up influencing the perception he or she creates of life, dealing with situations in his or her own way. So, avoid comparing everything you have been through with everything this one experiences. The circumstances, elements and people are different in each situation.

3. understand the other as he/she is

Avoid changing someone just to make them conform to your way of thinking Following the previous topic, it is necessary to understand that each one of us is unique precisely because of our composition and what we go through, so when you understand this, you avoid creating frustrations or baseless expectations.

I want information to enroll in the Psychoanalysis Course .

After all, how do you put yourself in the other person's shoes?

Having someone by our side who can understand us allows many of our pains to be less critical. The problem may not be solved, but a person who is willing to understand us will give us the strength to move on.

In this context, the willingness to put oneself in the other's shoes comes from genuine solidarity This can be achieved when we start reviewing the way we feel about someone. Awareness allows the parties to come closer together, making it just one for the hour. Be empathetic to the right extent, that is, whenever necessary.

To help you build the skill of put yourself in the other's place Psychotherapy allows us to see other people in a deeper and more complete way. Furthermore, you also see yourself more deeply, thus feeding a continuous and aggrandizing process of self-knowledge. Enroll now!