It is common for a great mass of people to anticipate conflict situations in order to protect themselves from suffering. However, this ends up amplifying their pain, even about something that has not even happened or may happen. If you are of suffer in anticipation Check out these 10 tips on how to avoid and work on the problem.

Is it all just a worry in your head or a real problem?

Sometimes we end up giving a situation more power than it should have. It all happens thanks to our way of seeing reality, and because of this we project our fear onto it. Before you start suffering in anticipation, ask yourself if there is a real problem or just an unfounded worry .

If this is just a concern, keep in mind that most of the ones we have don't materialize. At some times we are so fragile that we end up expecting the worst, so combine it with the pessimism we feel. However, if there is a real problem, avoid putting it off and start working on a solution.

Let the past stay where it is

One of the biggest causes of someone suffering from anticipation is attachment to bad situations experienced in the past. Basically, we end up recalling bad experiences and associate them with the events we are immersed in at present. If this is the case, think about two things:

Reality does not always repeat itself

Don't waste your energy trying to project something that happened in the past now onto your present. If something happened once, it doesn't mean it will happen again. Instead of worrying about it, try to face reality as it is without fears and with a plan for your life.

Situations and people are different

There is no single recipe for favorable or unfavorable situations, and it is almost impossible to repeat any scene. This is because the moment, the places, and especially the people are different from the ones we know. On that path, avoid making projections about your fears and don't get caught up in them .

Try to solve your problems as soon as possible

For whatever reason, some people end up ignoring their own problems and pushing them off until tomorrow. To imagine, think of someone who throws clothes into their closet in piles without cleaning and/or folding. At some point their door will give way and everything will fall to the floor.

Although silly, the analogy makes reference to when we push our problems and they pile up. The sooner we solve them, the easier it is to have a light life and not to worry about the future. However difficult it may be, deal with your hang-ups and close each chapter soon.

Get busy

Although relaxing and doing nothing is sometimes a good thing, depending on how you think about it, it can be bad too. Idleness gives us more room for our fears and negative emotions to surface with greater speed and strength. This feeds us bad and unproductive ideas that make us suffer in anticipation.

In order to avoid this, try to occupy yourself with something that you enjoy and that can bring you some pleasure. This is not a detour, but rather building a pleasant environment where you can relax and discharge your tension. These moments of joy can recharge you to seek solutions to what has been bothering you, or even erase bad idealizations.

The present is a gift. Live it!

Although it may sound redundant, living in the present is one of the greatest freedoms we can give ourselves. Not to mention that unique opportunities can arise and be lost because we don't look at them. To avoid this kind of situation, focus on the things that are happening in the now without getting lost because of it .

The advice is to live in the present and not to get hung up on what might come tomorrow and what happened in the past. There is no way to predict what might happen, and striving for it is an unnecessary expense. If you have a pending issue or problem, focus on it in parallel with your life, without creating negative expectations for the future.

Fear vs. reality

Even adults can keep creating monsters about some things that they are not dealing with truthfully. Sometimes the solution is simpler than it seems, but the fear is so great that it becomes distorted With that:

Deal with your fear

Avoid letting fear about what might happen take over your judgment. As opened lines above, you may be projecting your fears and causing them to gain more proportion. Deal better with your fear, see its roots and how to control the anxious unpleasantness of having it.

Believe in your potential

If you do have a problem, believe in your potential and that you can handle it. It is never easy to be faced with situations that put your name in question. Still, deal with it maturely and do everything you can to solve it.

Expectations are not good even in movies

One of the triggers that makes someone suffer from anticipation is creating expectations that are more real than the truth. Many end up making a list of what to expect and what will happen. However, creating expectations, especially negative ones, only serves to attract suffering and torture you .

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Avoid feeding negative ideas that end up destroying your self-confidence. Almost certain that everything you think about your hang-ups doesn't even exist and only hurts you Learn to say "enough!" to these erroneous projections.

Have fun!

Take time out to enjoy yourself and stop suffering in anticipation by doing something you enjoy. At least once a week, live your life without worrying for a while and believe in your recovery. In this case, we are talking about temporarily letting go of the weight of your life and seeking relaxation for a few hours.

Know when to say "no!"

For those situations in which you may suffer by anticipation, know when to say "no" without feeling guilt. Many times we end up giving in favor of the other and suffering for what may happen next. For example, when someone "invites" you to a party and you, who didn't want to go, get anxious wondering how it will be.

Moving on, it is common for you to accept this by thinking later about how you would like to say "no". Avoid feeling obligated and exposing yourself to any emotional damage by giving in too much to someone's wishes.

Accept the worst, but think about the solution

To close the tips on suffering in anticipation, if the worst happens, go for the solution. Never stop to think about the worst that has already happened and lament over it. Accept the situation, but mobilize to change it as soon as possible.

Final considerations about suffering in anticipation

By suffering in anticipation, we end up creating a voluntary prison in which suffering is our jailer Trying to anticipate bad situations is a sign that you have very little faith in yourself and let yourself be carried away by your problems.

Instead of wasting your time thinking about it, try to separate reality from your fears. Is what is happening now really a problem or is it just a projection of yours? In any case, always believe in your resolution capacity and in the transformations you can make.

A great ally and reinforcement in this journey is our online course in Clinical Psychoanalysis, the most complete in the market. Through it, you will deal with your uncertainties, improve your posture, and polish your self-knowledge in order to evolve. Contact us and find out how Psychoanalysis prevents you from suffering in anticipation and gain access and control of your inner potential .